Something’s Fishy

Something’s Fishy


There are some things I read about this week that I have to believe are related. If they’re not, I’m going to make them that way.

First, in order to entice people to get the vaccine, they are offering free things. You just show your card and receive these items. I’m not talking fanny packs and koozies. I’m talking about a dispensary in Michigan that will give you a free marijuana joint. Then, if that’s not good enough, Krispy Kreme is offering a free donut. Tell me those aren’t related.

“Dude, give me one of them free donuts.”

“This is the seventh time you’ve been in here in the last hour. Did you smoke one of those free joints?”

“Wow man, how did you know?”

Then there’s the story about the guy who found shrimp tails in his box of “Cinnamon Toast Crunch.” How can seafood in cereal be a mistake? Certainly those two things aren’t being processed in the same room. I think they’re testing us.

Fish for breakfast isn’t really common. Ok, except for smoked salmon, which you have to be in the mood for. I’ll eat it on occasion.

Once, I was working a cruise line and was having breakfast with the Second City group that were also performing. I had a bowl of oatmeal and then took the yolk out of a hard-boiled egg…that’s where the cholesterol is…and stuffed it with a piece of salmon.

From the look of repulsion on her face, I could tell one of the girls was grossed out by this. You’re disgust only inspires me. I did the same to another egg and shoved the whole thing in my mouth.

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