
Ok, Now You Can Panic

Ok, Now You Can Panic
Tell the truth, you knew they were going to lose. From the time you first saw they would be playing in Oakland on the schedule, you put an L in the column. You have to give them credit though. Every time the Steelers play out there, they somehow manage to find new ways to screw it up.
If you’re a Pittsburgh fan, you know you’re not an optimist. It’s something about this area. Maybe, it’s the lack of sunny days, or something in the water. Being a Pittsburgh fan means hoping for the best but expecting the worst. It’s in our nature. That’s why as soon as a team wins a Super Bowl or a Stanley Cup…notice, I didn’t say World Series? That’s because most of you either haven’t been alive long enough to remember or won’t live long enough to experience it.
What I’m saying is, as soon as a team wins a championship, fans start talking about if they can do it again next year instead of enjoying the moment. Because we’re spoiled, except with the Pirates.
Who are you blaming for the loss on Sunday? The coach? The quarterback? The kicker who can’t kick?
Why was Ben Roethlisberger standing on the sidelines for most of the second half? When they left the field at halftime, he was fine. Then when they came back for the third quarter, he was injured. Did he fall in the locker room? Fall off the toilet?
When he came back on the field, they said he was injured but was able to come back in. So why didn’t he? Oh, that’s right he did. After the Steelers fell behind. He seemed perfectly ok when he completed 6 straight passes for a touchdown.
So, they were saving him until they needed him. Like that pair of shoes you won’t wear outside because you want them to stay looking new.
If Ben comes in earlier, they don’t have to rely on the kicker…who, if for some odd reason is still the kicker next Sunday, should expect a heartfelt and supportive round of applause for the troubles he is going through on the field. Either that or he will be booed back to Oakland. Too close to call.
I remember our kicker in High School used to occasionally line a field goal attempt into the center’s ass. At least that was funny because it wasn’t my ass that was stinging. There is no humor in what Boswell has been doing this year.
Anyway, what seemed a for sure playoff appearance, is in jeopardy after three straight losses. Remember a few weeks back when you were talking about getting at least a second and possibly a first seed? How does no seed sound?
Now, as fans, we face the very real possibility of having nothing to look forward to after the holidays except the brutal January weather. You won’t be able to be lazy,
“We’ll leave the tree up until the Steelers are out of the playoffs.”
You’ll have to stick to resolutions.
“I can’t start my diet until the Steelers are out of the playoffs. Unless you can find me diet wings and pizza.”
So how would we spend our January weekends if they don’t make the playoffs? Maybe we can use the time to better ourselves. Read a book or spend the day at a museum or art gallery…Yes, I know what I can go do to myself.
Seriously though, how can you not make an extra point?

Baby It’s Insane Outside

Baby its Insane Outside
It started last week, when a Cleveland radio station said they would no longer play the Christmas Classic, “Baby It’s Cold Outside.” The song was first released in 1949 and nobody has had a problem with it until now. Apparently, it contains predatory undertones and is leading to date rape.
Sorry, I never got that message from the song. If you live in a cave and have never heard it, it’s done as a duet between a man and a woman at his place during a snowstorm. From the lyrics I’ve listened to, she has shown up unannounced to his place during a major snow storm.
Yes, he’s feeding her drinks, but she keeps asking for them. At one point she does ask,
“What’s in the drink?”
Now, unless Bill Cosby wrote the lyrics, I’m guessing she’s asking about the type of alcohol.
At one point in the song, she asks if she can borrow a coat…So, a coatless woman shows up at his place during a major snow storm and he’s not supposed to think anything of it. There’s no mention of, I came by to bring over your mail, a Christmas gift or some cookies…well, the kind you eat anyway.




