Baby It’s Insane Outside


Baby its Insane Outside


It started last week, when a Cleveland radio station said they would no longer play the Christmas Classic, “Baby It’s Cold Outside.” The song was first released in 1949 and nobody has had a problem with it until now. Apparently, it contains predatory undertones and is leading to date rape.

Sorry, I never got that message from the song. If you live in a cave and have never heard it, it’s done as a duet between a man and a woman at his place during a snowstorm. From the lyrics I’ve listened to, she has shown up unannounced to his place during a major snow storm.

Yes, he’s feeding her drinks, but she keeps asking for them. At one point she does ask,

“What’s in the drink?”

Now, unless Bill Cosby wrote the lyrics, I’m guessing she’s asking about the type of alcohol.

At one point in the song, she asks if she can borrow a coat…So, a coatless woman shows up at his place during a major snow storm and he’s not supposed to think anything of it. There’s no mention of, I came by to bring over your mail, a Christmas gift or some cookies…well, the kind you eat anyway.

OK, that was wrong and I will be hearing from the “Me Too” movement about it. I just don’t know how a seventy year old song suddenly becomes offensive.

Why stop there? Let’s go after some of the other Christmas songs. Is “Frosty the Snowman” appropriate for children? If you pay attention, he dies at the end. In the song, the snowman magically comes to life and winds up a puddle by the end. Is this the kind of “Merry Christmas” we want children to hear?

Then there’s “Deck the Halls.” Everything is OK up until,

“Don we now our gay apparel.”

You just know at least one idiot is upset by that.

“I’m dreaming of a White Christmas.”

Could it be anymore racist?

The latest is backlash against the holiday classic, “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.” It turns out, Rudolph is bullied by his peers and verbally abused by his father because of his disability. Of course, his particular affliction is that he has a nose that lights up red and requires two AA batteries.

Now, they’re saying his girlfriend, Clarice’s father is bigoted because he won’t let her date him. Let me ask you ladies, how thrilled would your father have been if the first guy you brought home had a nose that lit up?

“What’s this guy on?”

So now, I suppose we should no longer read “The Night Before Christmas.” After all, it does attack Santa for having a problem with obesity.

“A round little belly, that shook when he laughed like a bowl full of jelly!”

Then, if that wasn’t enough, the next sentence calls him “jolly and plump.” Hey, maybe Santa has issues he’s dealing with that he replaces with overeating. I mean, the man lives at the North Pole where it’s cold all the time and there’s not much sunlight.

On top of that, he only gets out one night a year. You have to imagine he’s dealing with depression. So what if he tries to cheer himself up with fried foods and sweets. Until he gets the professional help he needs, we should be more sensitive about his weight issues instead of calling him “Plump.”

I can’t cover all of the songs and stories this season brings. If you have a problem with any, let me know. Oh, and if this whole thing sounds totally ridiculous, that’s because it is.

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