It Smells Like What?

It Smells Like What?


It was brought to my attention a few weeks ago that Gwyneth Paltrow is now selling a candle that smells like her vagina…Why would I make that up? I may be out of the loop as far as pop culture goes so, I didn’t know there was a demand to smell Gwyneth Paltrow’s vagina.

Nothing shocks me anymore. We’re in the end of days as far as I can see. Somehow we started living in bizzaro world and there are no limits.

What would make you think it would be a good idea to market a burning piece of wax that smells like any vagina? I don’t think anybody would buy a candle that smells like my penis. Shaped like it maybe…Who wants to blow out my candle?…C’mon, that’s gold! It would be a long burning candle…Yeah, shut up.

Anyway, I priced these candles online. The lowest price on eBay was $239.50. You would think for that kind of money, Gwyneth would show up at your house and let you take a whiff. At least set up a kiosk in the middle of the mall.

Hundreds of curious men and women with two hundred and forty bucks to throw away could line up for a sniff. Gwyneth would just have to sit there and rake in the money.


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